My favorite thing about the theory that Michael Afton is all the named night guards and the fright guard is that he’s awful at creating aliases.

Michael: My last name? It’s, uh, Snard.

Employer: …And your first name?

Michael, sweating: Snight

so, about that pizza tycoon game…. i have a few ideas

my favorite thing about Willtrap is the idea of him his usual over the top self and Michael’s just off in the background being super embarrassed

“I have no idea who or what this is“ says the guy who looks and sounds exactly like him as his furry-suited father does a dance step and tries to snap a springlock on a dude’s neck

fredbearings:

i felt like this fits the egg baby fairly well [x]

I want my father, on his death bed– four or five years from now– to look at me and say, ‘That! That is the man that I raised!’ And I want him to be pointing at some other guy. Because that means that maybe, just maybe, I am not his biological son.

Michael (via totallycorrectfnafquotes)

My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words ‘I probably should’ve thought this through’ typed over and over.

Michael (via totallycorrectfnafquotes)

I live in constant fear that someone will kidnap my father, William Afton, who lives at 822 58th street, keeps door unlocked, can’t miss it.

Michael (via totallycorrectfnafquotes)

Father likes to say you can be part of the problem or part of the solution, but I happen to believe you can be both.

Michael (via totallycorrectfnafquotes)

Michael: Oh no. You’re getting an idea, aren’t you?
William: Yeah.
Michael: Is this idea going to get me in trouble?
William: Maybe.
Michael: Is this idea going to cause me physical pain?
William: Yeah, definitely.

Tired of people always telling me to go to the hospital and that I’ve lost a lot of blood. It’s my severe head injury, not yours. Stay out of it.

Michael (via totallycorrectfnafquotes)